I recently attended the famous Memphis in May BBQ Fest with one of my closest friends.  We walked a lot and talked a lot…mostly about if and why we were and were not happy with our bodies.  That’s an easy topic to get on when you are surrounded with 16-50 something year old women who look freaking “fantastic” walking around with guys whistling their ways.  I didn’t get a whistle and neither did she.  We USED to get whistles 🙂 Among this and other reasons, a woman does start to doubt herself, to lose self esteem, and just get sad.  But I did not!  In fact, it inspired this blog so I’m SUPER excited I went!!!

You see, I used to be “THAT girl”.     That girl that got the looks, that got the whistles, the hoots and hollers….The girl that could take an hour to get ready and folks thought she took several…the girls folks said resembled movie stars or the one they said they “seen in their dreams”… I had a high metabolism, ate whatever I want and never exercised.  I was THAT girl….

But now…I’m THIS girl!    I’m the girl who’s a bit overweight, un-apologetically.  The girl who had a hysterectomy and gained a whole new body.  I’m the girl who, for 30 years, knew myself one way and now is getting used to the NEW me!  This is why it’s OK!…These amazing people right here….

I just want to take some time to give you my top 5 reasons that I love being NEW ME!

1. Individuality- Not everyone changes.  There are some that stay the “IT” girl for most of their lives and that’s GREAT!  That’s THEIR unique selves.  I changed but I am so happy with who I am and what I have to work with!  I always get on this spill and I’m GONNA AGAIN….society conditioned us to what our perception is of beautiful, of attractive, of what we “should” be.  That is not what God sees, that is not what the ones who matter most see and that is not what should be seen.  If you reflect on why you think that smaller legs, a tighter stomach, and a thinner neck would make you happy, chances are you will find that it isn’t because you’re HEALTHY or you’re the best you that you can be…it’s because that’s what gets on magazine covers, that’s what makes it big in Hollywood and in most cases, that’s what snobby mean girls tell you!  It isn’t truth and it isn’t going to make you happy.  I welcome and embrace my individuality and I think that I am beautiful inside and out because that’s how God made me!
2. My Family is Happy-I talk to my husband often about myself.  Not in a conceded way but in a “I wanna make sure you’re happy” way.  Whether it’s things i’m doing or not doing at home. how i’m treating him, how I treat our children, and, YES, how I look.  If my husband is frustrated or unhappy with something, I commit to him to discuss it and change it so that we are stay strong.  He isn’t a “typical guy”.  He isn’t the guy that says, “if you gain weight, we have a problem”.  I haven’t seen one change in him or our relationship in the past 40 pounds!  Which is great for me obviously! 🙂 My kids tell me almost every day that I look beautiful, whether I’m wearing make up or not.  They love when I spend time with them and they love when I’m in an “I love me” type of mood because that positive energy pours out of me into them!
3. I’m not hungry- I’m not going to be the person that starves herself to offset the drastic shift in her metabolism.  I’m going to eat, in as much moderation as my will-power allows, and I’m happy about that!  I want to be healthy, not thin!
4. I’m happy-I have read, heard, and seen cases where, yeah, the chick may be a knock-out, but her self esteem is lower than you can imagine, she seeks acceptance with men who treat her like dirt, and she takes anything and everything she can find in her medicine cabinet to curve her appetite.  That’s not healthy and that’s not safe.  If you start searching for your happy in men, medicine, and friends who aren’t real friends, you’re going to have a lot more in life to worry about than if your size 3 jeans fit!
5. Finally-God-God is really number one in my life.  Before me, before my husband, before my kids, my friends, and even before any of these tips listed.  I only listed at the end because I want to ensure that one of the last things you read here, is the most important and the biggest tip to take away.  God never said thin is beautiful.  God never said to find your beauty in what others think of you.  God never said that your body has anything to do what what He finds beautiful.  Nope…in fact, here’s what God said…

1 Peter-Beauty should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit which is of great worth in God’s sight.

2 Corinthians-though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day.

Psalm 34-Those who look to him are radiant, and their faces shall never be ashamed.

And finally one of my most favorites…

Psalm 139:14- I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, and I know that full well.

Having cited these, I do not think that we should not try to look “our best”.  I don’t shy away from makeup, new clothes, or great shoes….what I DO shy away from is downing myself, ridiculing myself or letting the things that society has put in my brain take away from my self esteem and my true belief that God has made me exactly how I should be and that is absolutely beautiful.

I strongly encourage you to make a daily, conscious, EXTREMELY intentional effort to work on being healthy…but also work harder on being a beautiful person on the inside versus being Cosmo magazine’s version of beautiful on the outside!

Bye for now,

RR